Exploring the Kivin Method for Cunnilingus
The Kivin Method, an unfamiliar but intriguing cunnilingus technique, presents numerous benefits. This article provides an introductory overview of this method, with input from sex educator Cassandra Corrado.
Attention, champions of cunnilingus, seekers of sexual exploration, and pleasure enthusiasts!
Whether you're looking to infuse novelty into your cunnilingus techniques or intrigued by the prospect of discovering something new, allow me to present the Kivin Method. For those still familiarizing themselves with sexual terminology, cunnilingus refers to oral sex performed on the vulva, colloquially known as 'eating out'.
Understanding the Kivin Method
At its core, the Kivin Method is a reinterpretation of cunnilingus, introducing a novel positional shift that pivots the act onto its side.
In contrast to the linear alignment typically found in traditional techniques, the Kivin Method situates the participants in a perpendicular configuration. This unique alignment can be likened to the right angle formed by joining your thumb and index finger, illustrating a rather unanticipated intersection of geometry and intimate encounters.
Should you find yourself puzzled, there's no cause for alarm. A comprehensive explanation of the implementation of this method will follow shortly.
Origination of the Kivin Method
While we might wish to attribute the method to a definitive source, the true originator of the Kivin Method eludes identification.
Joan Price, in her book Naked at Our Age, published in 2011, states that the Kivin Method was "originally presented by Dr. Patti Britton in Paris". However, she does not divulge further details pertaining to the event or the precise date of this presentation.
A 2003 edition of The Atlantic refers to the method, sourcing it from The Complete Idiot's Guide to Tantric Sex, a book penned by Dr. Judy Kuriansky, and published in 2001.
Regardless of these references, it's plausible that the Kivin Method was being practiced even before it acquired its official designation. Consequently, when inclined to express appreciation, one might simply extend a gracious "thank you" to the Universe.
Advantages of the Kivin Method
According to a study conducted in 2018, among self-identified women, 63.7% showed a preference for up-and-down vulvar stimulation compared to other techniques such as circular or sideways stimulation. Although vertical vulvar and clitoral stimulation by hand feels quite intuitive, performing the same with the tongue can result in swift exhaustion of the jaw, neck, and tongue.
Herein lies the value of the Kivin Method.
The performer of cunnilingus, by lying perpendicular to the recipient, ensures the entire vulva is readily accessible, thereby reducing neck strain. Furthermore, thanks to this innovative positioning, a lateral tongue movement—which is less demanding on the neck—translates to an up and down sensation for the recipient, a nifty quirk indeed.
The following are some compelling reasons to consider exploring the Kivin Method:
1. Minimization of Neck Strain for the Performer
In the conventional cunnilingus position, the performer may experience a discomforting neck strain over time. Envision yourself seated upright, looking upwards toward the sky or ceiling, similar to the head posture typically adopted during traditional cunnilingus; maintaining this stance can become increasingly uncomfortable.
The Kivin Method facilitates greater engagement of your upper body and permits support for your head and neck alignment with resources like pillows, such as the Liberator Ramp, your arm, or even your partner's leg. Additionally, alleviating neck strain may extend your endurance, avoiding premature cessation due to discomfort as your partner approaches orgasm.
2. Enhanced Access to the Entire Vulva Translates to Amplified Pleasure
Although the clitoris is a marvel, it is so much more than just the perceptible clitoral glans. This "nub", visible and palpable at the vulva's apex, is merely the tip of the proverbial iceberg.
The remaining structure of the clitoris resembles a double wishbone; the exterior legs or crura extend beyond the labia majora, while the inner bulbs or vestibular bulbs nestle behind the labia minora, flanking the vaginal opening.
Every segment of the clitoris boasts high sensitivity, and stimulation of areas beyond the glans can yield intense pleasure. The Kivin Method affords the performer expanded access to the vulva, enabling effortless stimulation of the labia, vaginal opening, and perineum.
3. Relief of Pressure on the Receiver's Hips and Pelvis
Traditional cunnilingus positioning often requires the recipient to spread their knees as widely as possible. As those with vulvas approach orgasm, the surrounding muscles of the buttocks, hips, and pelvis tend to contract and relax—a process which can induce cramping in the lotus-style position, particularly for individuals with joint complications or arthritis.
The Kivin Method invites the recipient to drape one of their legs over the performer's back or onto a supportive pillow, such as the Liberator Wedge. This slight adjustment can significantly relieve pressure on the hips, reducing occurrences of mid-act cramping interruptions.
4. Simplified Access to the Buttocks
The combination of a lifted leg and sideways positioning greatly facilitates access to the buttocks during cunnilingus. The perineum, the delicate tissue between the vulva and anus, is notably sensitive and thus a potent focus for stimulation.
The Kivin Method optimizes access to this area, but remember: if incorporating anilingus into your cunnilingus routine, employing a dental dam can prevent unintentional transmission of fecal matter. Even if not utilizing your tongue for perineal stimulation, your fingers or a toy can introduce a novel layer of sensation. Individuals of all genders and genital configurations can find anal play enjoyable, so consider discussing this possibility with your partner.
5. Potential for Quicker Orgasms
Owing to comprehensive vulvar access and the potential for varied stimulation, the Kivin Method may facilitate more efficient attainment of orgasms. However, every body is unique, and there is no failure in sexual experience if your orgasm does not occur sooner or does not occur at all.
While some individuals have reported expedited orgasms via the Kivin Method, this may not be the case for you. Instead of pursuing a new personal best, prioritize your overall physical pleasure during the experience.
How to Perform the Kivin Method
The initiation of any novel experience can often elicit a sense of trepidation. Rest assured, perfection need not be the aim during your initial attempts.
Your focus should be on exploration, curiosity, and connection with your partner, rather than adhering strictly to a predetermined set of steps. Consider the following instructions as a flexible blueprint that you are welcome to adjust as per your unique needs and desires!
1. Be playful
Many individuals find it challenging to inject playfulness into bedroom activities, often due to performance anxieties or goal-oriented tendencies, which cause us to lose sight of the ultimate purpose: pleasure. Unless role-playing appeals to you, then by all means, follow your interests.
Whenever you experiment with a new technique, position, or even indulge in roleplay or salacious conversations, make it a fun exploration. The initial discomfort or awkwardness that may arise is a natural part of the learning curve. Embrace the curiosity that accompanies the exploration of your and your partner's desires, progressively advancing at a pace that is comfortable for you both.
2. Communicate about it
Let me be forthright: there isn't a single universally adored sexual technique. We all differ in our bodies, desires, and means of deriving pleasure—and that's perfectly normal! There's also no need to be an immediate expert.
Instead of making assumptions about the anticipated greatness of a new technique or obsessing over perfect execution, focus on soliciting your partner's feedback. Understand their preferences, what they find pleasurable, and their comfort levels.
If you happen to be the recipient, provide the giver with constructive feedback, and don't shy away from requesting adjustments when necessary. Establishing open communication is pivotal to cultivating a pleasurable sexual encounter, making it an essential point to revisit time and again.
3. Get into basic position for the Kivin Method
Don't let the thought of getting into the Kivin Method position stress you. At its core, it is a sexual position designed to augment pleasure for all involved. The receiver assumes a supine position in a comfortable location, with the giver positioned perpendicularly at the level of the vulva.
The recipient is then asked to lift their leg closest to the giver, resting it on the giver's back. The exact placement isn't crucial; comfort is the priority. To enhance support, consider using a sex pillow beneath the receiver's hips, or place a pillow under your partner's head and neck. Bondage ties, spreader bars, and positioning straps could also be used to comfortably maintain the receiver's leg position.
Starting arrangements need not be binding; feel free to adapt the setup as per your comfort and desire.
Once you are set, the giver's head should be roughly at vulva level. Verify your partner's comfort with the position, make adjustments if necessary, and you are ready to commence!
4. Use your mouth
The Kivin Method allows the giver's tongue to cover a larger expanse of the vulva. Rather than restricting attention to the clitoris, let your tongue glide side-to-side and up-and-down, establishing a rhythm that's mutually agreeable.
Starting with softer, slower strokes and gradually increasing speed and pressure as per your partner's feedback is advisable. Don't confine yourself to a singular motion with the Kivin Method. Explore diverse patterns, intensities, and speeds to identify what's most pleasurable.
The comfortable open hip position facilitates easier stimulation of the introitus (vaginal opening) using your tongue. The densely-packed nerve endings of the vaginal opening would welcome such attention.
The allure of the Kivin Method lies in its comprehensive engagement with the vulva. Rather than maintaining an exclusive concentration on the clitoral glans, the method encourages an intimate exploration of your partner's anatomy. With the Kivin Method, your tongue becomes an instrument of pleasure, eliciting sensations from the labia majora, labia minora, vaginal entrance, inner thighs, perineum, and any other zones of mutual enjoyment. Importantly, this principle extends beyond the bounds of the Kivin Method—it equally applies to traditional cunnilingus practices.
5. Use your hands
The power of hands in oral sex is often underestimated. They can provide an additional layer of stimulation and offer your tongue and jaw a well-deserved break.
Try placing gentle pressure on the pubic mound or slightly retracting the clitoral hood. Altering the pressure using one or two fingers on the labia majora flanking the clitoral glans can enhance orgasms and expose the glans further.
Your fingers can also provide internal stimulation to the vagina while your tongue caters to the clitoris and vulva. When your tongue or jaw requires rest, let your fingers take over. Fancy massaging a part of your partner's body? Employ your hands!
Integrating a perineal massage into your routine by using your fingertips and a touch of lubrication can heighten the pleasure experience. For some enthusiasts, perineal stimulation is viewed as an indispensable component of the Kivin Method. Nonetheless, individual preference is the definitive guide. Should perineal stimulation enhance your pleasure, feel free to embrace it. Conversely, if it doesn't appeal, shift your focus to other areas of gratification.
With countless possibilities at your disposal, consider your hands as an auxiliary tool and utilize them to their full potential.
6. Add in a toy
Oral sex isn't confined to using only your mouth; hands can lend their support, and so can toys! You might want to incorporate a bullet vibrator onto your partner's clitoris while your mouth is busy exploring the rest of their vulva.
To integrate hands-free vaginal play alongside clitoral glans stimulation, consider using a G-spot vibrator.
Toys can facilitate anal play without the risk of unintentionally transferring fecal matter or bacteria from the anus to the vagina. A small anal plug can create a sensation of fullness, potentially intensifying orgasms. For those with more anal play experience, a larger plug with extra features could be a worthwhile consideration.
Remember, toys are tools. Their use to enhance a sexual experience bears no reflection on your partner's sexual prowess.
Experiencing the Kivin Method
Numerous articles may advocate that the Kivin Method offers the pinnacle of cunnilingus experiences, and that it leaves individuals yearning for more. Indeed, many derive great pleasure from it.
However, individual experiences can vary substantially. Some may find the position uncomfortable or perhaps the broad stimulation of the vulva, inherent to the Kivin Method, may not be to their liking. In the event your partner communicates their dissatisfaction, listen. There's no failing in not favouring a position, technique, or toy, even if it is widely acclaimed. Pleasure is inherently subjective!
Despite such variation, the Kivin Method is lauded by many for its distinct pleasurable sensations and its more natural and comfortable position relative to traditional cunnilingus. For those who desire a comprehensive exploration of their vulva rather than a sole focus on the clitoris, the Kivin Method presents a plethora of opportunities that may previously have been overlooked.
The key to the Kivin Method lies in an open-minded and curious approach. It encourages playfulness, tolerance for a degree of clumsiness, and the need for adjustment until an optimal angle is found. The prospect of trying out the Kivin Method should be discussed beforehand and revisited after the experience. Embrace the novelty and the courage it takes to venture into unknown territory!
In the end, remember: the definitive judge of how the Kivin Method feels for you is none other than yourself. Therefore, don your metaphorical scientist's hat and embark on this exploratory adventure!